We are truly ready for retirement now. We were gearing up for the big change in our life in early 2020 and had plans to go out walking, lunching etc., but the pandemic dictated a different narrative for us!

It is only now as Australia finds itself in a good position in terms of the pandemic (despite the occasional short lockdown), that we are ready to get moving. But what does that mean and how will we proceed from here? Here are a few of our thoughts for you to ponder…….

The first step can be the hardest!!!

Why? Because retirement signals a major change of routine and social activity in someone’s life. Of course it also signifies a new beginning, but that in itself can add to the trauma. Lack of social contact was not an issue for us but the change in routine and the removal of daily disciplines was a problem. We found it difficult to define how our new life would look, and take the first step forward.

Personally, I found it difficult to not be busy all the time. I had to force myself to sit and enjoy my morning coffee and not feel guilty when I relaxed. I was involved in a face mask making organisation throughout 2020 and for a time became very busy, because I desperately wanted to be occupied. Andrew found himself nodding off in the mid-afternoon every day for months, and whilst he did paint some rooms and potter round the garden, he lacked motivation.

We both felt quite lost and unable to change the way we were feeling. Of course we were pretty much confined to home for months anyway because of COVID-19, but we could have been doing more around the home – or that’s what we thought anyway.

But then we spoke to others who had recently retired and found that our period of ‘nothingness’ was pretty normal and that in a way it was a form of healing or recovering from years of busyness!

Giving yourself permission to take some time for restoration is important. Don’t be too hard on yourself if you are feeling tired and all over the place. Don’t worry and don’t rush into decision making!

But conversely you will need to snap out of it some time….

Moving from step 1 to step 2 i.e. doing something!

We have recently found the motivation to get moving again and have moved to that all important second step. We  have made some big decisions and have started towards implementing our plans. It is about 18 months since I stopped working and for Andrew it is just over 8-9 months. So what caused the change?

We took a long road trip and had a real holiday. We had smaller holidays last year and found ourselves hurrying home just like we would have done when we were still working. Our overseas trip was cancelled last year too so we were feeling a bit ripped off about that. So a 3 week, 3000 km trip away to South Australia was a great circuit breaker. We had time to chat when we were driving. We had time to go for long walks on the beach and just to get out of our daily routines!! We didn’t  feel sleepy in the afternoon while we were away! We talked about the big things –  like where we want to live in the future, when we want to move and how we will make the changes necessary.

We came back from our trip feeling motivated to get out of the big city for a tree change. We have a time frame and a possible location for our next home. We have already discussed how to rid ourselves of the clutter in the house, we have spoken with our children about them removing their many belongings and we are seriously contemplating building a new house! I said we were motivated didn’t I? We are raring to go!

So what can make you take that second step? Perhaps a holiday isn’t necessary for everyone but I firmly believe that you need to get right away from your day to day existence so that you can think clearly about your future life!!

The importance of being uncomfortable.

We feel like we are sitting on the edge of a precipice at the moment and it is uncomfortable….

There are already boxes of ‘stuff’ all over the house ready to donate to charity. There is timber and other hardware all over the back yard ready to be collected or sold. We have just completed a bathroom renovation and need other work done in other rooms of the house. We have to paint and carpet throughout to be ready to sell. Of course we also have the prospect of buying or building a house.

So why is it important to feel uncomfortable? So that we keep moving forward. If I was OK about having boxes all over my house I would lose that sense of urgency for change. I really hate mess, so each day I am motivated to make it right and keep stepping forward.

But of course as well as the discomfort we need something to be happy and excited about. The idea of building a house is scary but at the same time very exciting! It is an opportunity to be creative.

In some ways I want it to be all over, but at the same time I am excited that we will share this experience together. I want to enjoy the journey, not just the destination.

What’s Next?

I’ll keep you up to date with our new life and share some of my thoughts on the process. I hope you will join us on this journey by subscribing to our email list. We would love to hear from you, take your questions and provide answers if we are able.

Until next time,

 

 

Gillian (and Andrew)